Thursday, June 8, 2017

Man Up

When a man is being a little sissy boy, blaming others for his problems and lying about the truth. To start acting like a real man. Dude, you need to man up to the truth and accept responsibility for your actions.  - Joyle, Urban Dictionary

Yes, I know. The civilized thing for me to do right now is to become outraged and nauseated by urban street language such as man up.

Yet, I'd be dishonest with Citizen Readership if I were to exclaim such, as although I'm aware of the terrible unfairness with sexist language, there are those unfortunate times when all else has failed and nothing works quite as well as hurling a politically incorrect insult at a deserving party. 

Similar to the f-bomb, however, this expression will quickly lose its power and, worse, paint you as quite the Neanderthal, should it ever become part of a daily repertoire. Yet pulled out judiciously and with great timing, it can help gain the attention of those who've become immune to responsibility and are seen scampering away on all fours after having dumped a proverbial #2 onto a time-sensitive estate project - and one to which others must now be called in to clean up.

Such is the advice I provided a colleague this week while compassionately listening to her complaint regarding a long-time "trusted" vendor who, just as similar at risk for occurring with household staff whom for assorted reasons the family has retired while retaining on duty, continues to be unreliable, untouchable, and quite expensive to maintain. Much to the detriment of said family, their enormously expensive property, their onsite staff, and - not the least - they themselves who have dropped the desire to maintain accountability yet kept issuing regular payments which would indicate otherwise - another incident of unspeakable sloppy attention to detail was suffered, complete with invoice shamelessly delivered in hand.

In my experience, many vendors are at the same risk as all others floating in and out of the all-too-typical UHNW estate, and when one realizes they're waders-deep in and may easily keep submitting invoices (or drawing paychecks) without having to actually correct or even admit to any mistakes, there's often precious little anyone can do except to help them see a new perspective - and with a bit of saucy language being the only thing they're now capable of hearing.

Rare is the beautiful gem, I believe we'd all agree, who's willing to admit to those around him/her: "My bad. I realize that I've made a mistake here. But let me see what I can do to make this right, at my expense, and to regain your confidence in both my skills and my reliability." Those are the vendors and staff I want to keep around, and it's never because of their familiarity - yet because of their honorHonorable workers who can be fully trusted with fulfilling their responsibilities - and welcome being reviewed by their managers and being held accountable to the agreed-upon service standards - those workers always deserve an honorable approach. Yet, those are not the workers we're talking about here.


Admittedly, this strategy is a bit of a wild card, of course; as depending on how deeply they're entrenched into the family office checking account and/or personal relationships upstairs, they could dig in even deeper still. Yet, I say it's worth a shot to speak your mind to such manifestations of smallness and to let Nancy know that although you may have no ultimate authority over correcting his shoddy presentation (nor his attendant thievery), you are, yourself, not fooled.

And if you, yourself, have consistently demonstrated honorable character traits across the board thus far while assuming completion of your own responsibilities, that simple notification, alone, may often be enough to help them - whatever gender they actually happen to be - bring themselves and their workplace character - up.

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